Great news, everyone! Egypt’s former dictator, Hosni Mubarak, is going to prison for life! Of course, he is 84 years old and conveniently ill, but that’s not going to stop anyone from celebrating. When asked how he felt about his sentence, Mubarak grumpily replied, “I would have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for those meddling protestors.”
Lately I’ve been finding lots of messages in my inbox accusing me of anti-Semitism because of my posts making fun of the Prime Minister of Israel, Benjamin Netanyahu. Allow me to explain what it means to be anti-Semitic so you can understand why this blog is not.
“Benjamin Netanyahu is a liar because he is Jewish, and all Jewish people are liars.”
DICTATORS IN SILLY OUTFITS:
“Benjamin Netanyahu is a liar because he is a politician promoting a dangerously conservative agenda which is extremely biased against certain groups of people. This is not okay because he is the Prime Minister of a country that only exists because of dangerously conservative agendas which were extremely biased against specific groups of people.”
Please learn this very big difference to avoid future embarrassment and unnecessary repetition of the past. Have a nice day.
The Dictator: Why do autocrats do strange things? -
Sacha Baron Cohen’s latest comedy, The Dictator, features the antics of a fictional leader from North Africa. Admiral General Aladeen is an extreme representation, but why do real autocrats so often do strange things?
Extra! Extra! Read all about it! Ex-president of Liberia/war criminal extraordinaire Charles Taylor has been found guilty on all 11 charges of war crimes brought against him! Dictators in Silly Outfits has managed to get a rare interview with Charles himself:
DiSO: How does it feel to be the first former head of state indicted for war crimes by an international court since Nuremberg?
Charles Taylor: It’s pretty disappointing. I totally thought everyone was going to buy my lawyer’s “he was a good, legitimate leader who was forced into aiding the rebel scum next door” defense.
DiSO: Lol! Why would you think that when it is so obvious that you were heading a campaign of terror that involved murder, rape, sexual slavery, child soldiers, and blood diamonds?
Charles Taylor: I know, it was pretty obvious. I guess I was hoping everyone would be so distracted by that ridiculous Kony 2012 campaign that they would forget all about me and my own collection of kids with guns. I still don’t understand why Westerners who support similar kinds of rebel scum don’t have to stand trial.
DiSO: Neither does anyone else. I will say your sunglasses are pretty spectacular though.
Charles Taylor: Thank you. I wear them to protect my eyes from seeing the atrocities I have finally been punished for.
To mark the one year anniversary of the uprisings in Syria, I thought it would be appropriate to post this article containing even more reasons why Bashar al-Assad isn’t fit to lead… well, anything, really, especially not Syria.
Also, Chris Brown? Really? It’s like you’re trying to give people more reasons to think you’re a scumbag.
This Internet, which any demented person, any drunk can get drunk and write in, do you believe it? The Internet is like a vacuum cleaner, it can suck anything. Any useless person; any liar; any drunkard; anyone under the influence; anyone high on drugs; can talk on the Internet, and you read what he writes and you believe it. This is talk which is for free. Shall we become the victims of “Facebook” and “Kleenex” and “YouTube”! Shall we become victims to tools they created so that they can laugh at our moods? We decide our destiny, based on facts and our needs. Besides, this is not the era of blood, of smoke, of burning, of knives and axes; this is the era of the people, and supposedly the era of democracy. Everything is by election and referendum, ie, through the people’s direct authority, which is the people’s direct democracy, and not through rumours, and Facebook, and YouTube, and the Kleenex and the cables of American Ambassadors. This world wide web Internet is laughing at us and damaging our countries; it is tearing up our clothes; and killing our children for it. — Year-old quote from our deceased friend Muammar Gaddafi, which I just stumbled upon and desperately needed to share.
Sacha Baron Cohen arrives at the Oscars.